अणुभाष्य (महाप्रभु वल्लभाचार्य - शुद्धाद्वैत वेदान्त ब्रह्मसूत्र महाभाष्य प्रकाश टीका सहित)

( 30 ) This leads us to note another important trait of his, which was complete आश्रय, viz., willing dependence on the will and wisdom of the Lord, at all times, however critical and in all matters, however important. His mind was therefore always at ease, and he was never oppressed with burden or weight on his head for anything whatever. “भगवदिच्छा सर्वत्र मूलम्, न बुद्ध्यादिदोषाः शङ्कनीयाः ।” सु. ११. १. १८. This was ingrained in him, and hence under most trying circumstances, he was most light-hearted. This आश्रय resulted in other important traits, viz., अभय, स्वमान and निःस्वार्थ, fearlessness, self-respect and self-sacrifice. Though he had nothing, he seemed to posses everything, he could talk straight to a king on equal footing, and while engaged in सम्प्रदायसाहित्यसेवा, in his small room, he acted like a happy king, surrounded by co-working companions, all merry-making, sometimes sitting two on broken chairs, or comfortably couched on the broad handles of a broken easy-chair. The chairs were sometimes discarded and heaped out of the room near the door, for making room for men. His children cried and ran to him to escape the wrath of the mother, and insisted on sitting on his table, full of old manuscripts, or in his lap, while he was deciphering some knotty passage in an old manuscript. The mother of the children per- haps silently cursed the man for his neglect of the house and its inmates, and even expressed her disapprobation in sharp significant words. This was all well as it was, because it was God's will, which is always best, and the work of comparing and correcting manuscripts, sometimes five, sometimes ten at a time, went on till midnight with the help of a jewel-lamp in the middle. गोस्वामी श्रीब्रजरत्नलालजी of Surat, as well as most prominent personages and वैष्णवs from Kathiawad, Sind, Culcutta, Nainital, Madras saw him in this room. The difference between the small room and the great man, who was doing the abstruse work of deciphering and publishing old manuscripts was patent to all. This आश्रय and धैर्य resulting from it kept him always collected, though there may be the greatest cause for losing one's temper. If there was a caste-dinner at his place, and there is none to work and no invitations are sent, he is calm; if there is a procession, and no tom-toms are available, he is calm; if people did not pay the money due to him, it was God's will; if members of the family are laid up with illness, if he is unjustly attacked in news-papers, he is not the least disturbed. He goes on quietly with his self-imposed work, with a concentration of mind and with a non-attachment to surroundings (असंग) simply marvellous. This concentration continued even in sleep, and then naturally he got dreams. His little room was filled with hallowed light (so he said and we fully believe him), and he saw, (at any rate he believed he saw ) at one time श्रीपुरुषोत्तमजी and at other times other great persons or भक्तs. When he woke next morning after such a dream, there was a joyous smile on his face which was unmistakable, and the writer can never forget the innocent smile on his face on the morning of the last day of his life on this Earth, the 26th June, which clearly showed that he had some दर्शन in dream. 2030